Project Runway Season Three: Episode Nine Recap - 9/7/06

Episode nine (also known as Trip to Paris - Part Deux) starts with Catherine Malandrino giving the designers details about the new challenge. They will be designing a couture gown. Tim Gunn reminds the designers (and us rubes here at home) that couture refers to a type of design that involves a lot of hand sewn hems, beading, embroidery and other detailing. And they will only have two days to create the gown.  Catherine Malandrino says she will be holding a party where they will be presenting their gowns.

The designers head back to their hotel for a break and then Tim Gunn strolls with them across Paris, passing by such sights as the glass pyramid in the courtyard at the Louvre. He takes them to a restaurant where they sit outside and have a nice dinner.

Jeffrey is ecstatic that Angela is gone, and he is hoping to be the first designer to win a challenge while having immunity, which hasn't happened before on the show - I don't think. Jeffrey has immunity because he won the last challenge.

Laura, who looks like she is involved in an Immaculate Conception because suddenly she's, like, three months pregnant and showing already and she didn't look at all pregnant five minutes ago, voices her concerns about this challenge.  Anybody can be sent home any time.

"And an angel came upon Laura and said, 'Yea, ye shall conceive the first Project Runway baby.'"

The next day the designers hop on the train to go to a fabric store called Reine.  On the train a friendly Frenchman asks Jeffrey if he is an artist. And Jeffrey says, "No, I'm a terrorist who likes torturing people's mothers." Or a designer. Same difference.

Vince is feeling overly confident about this challenge. He says he's been trained in couture dressmaking and, like most things, "It just turns me on."

More than we need to know, Vince - more than we need to know.

Somebody get Vincent a gag before he tells us about more turn-ons!

Jeffrey is on the manic side of his bipolar disorder and is embracing a cheery yellow plaid fabric that has a "Happy, joyous, free" feeling to it. He also says he's taking inspiration from the Statue of Liberty for this challenge because, um, she wore a yellow tartan?  I don't get it.

Back at Parsons Paris Tim gives the designers photos of the Parisian models they will be fitting. But he also tells them they will be fitting their other models in the same garments back home in New York. That could get a bit tricky.

Tim encourages everyone to do something in French.  I don't think he said "Carry on," because that would be "Continuez" or "Poursuivrez."  And I don't think he said "Depechez-vous" which means "Hurry up."  And I don't think he said "Make it work" which I believe is "Donnez fonctionner."

This is what I get for not having Tivo. Total French confusion.

Uli is stepping up to the plate and taking things to the next level and designing a very grown up, elegant gown in an ice gray color.

Laura is doing something ill-advised involving endless amounts of white ruffled cuff and collar.

Kayne is psyched about the gold bodice he is making for his gown. He says that he is doing what he'd do for one of his favorite pageant girls.  The other designers look at the gaudy gold mesh he's working with and make faces. They worry he's being too pageanty again. Hey, at least it's not a Liberace outfit.

Vincent says his pattern is going to be a stunning fit.  Laura explains that "Vincent is a legend in his own mind." He keeps asking the other designers over to take a look as he holds the pattern against the form, wanting them to tell him how good it is.  They're not playing along, but Vincent doesn't notice.

The next morning at the hotel Jeffrey is using his battery operated shaver and making noise and Vince scolds him because he's still trying to sleep. So Jeffrey steps out on the balcony and makes the noise. He's not going to stop shaving. That would be too nice. To be nice is to show weakness. He is, after all, Cosa Nostra.

They are in the workroom for their second day of work. Laura is suddenly looking very Angelina Jolie pregnant, with her white tailored shirt tucked up over her distended mommy belly.  All she needs is a tiger tattoo to go with that.

A monkey on your back or a tiger on your back - both are painful.

Michael has high hopes for an ambitious blue dress with hand ruching. He's not a hand sewer, so all of the hand detailing is a big risk for him.

Tim stops by and hates Kayne's dress. But Kayne is in love, so there's no stopping him now.

Laura asks Tim if there will be a traditional runway walk the next day, and Tim plays it coy and says he can't tell her.

Laura worries that Kayne will have his head handed to him on a platter the next day, and she doesn't want him to get hurt.

Jeffrey says, "Who cares if he gets hurt?"

Remember the Cosa Nostra code. To show niceness is to show weakness. Don't ever show weakness

Vince tells Jeffrey that Laura is designing a Creature from the Black Lagoon dress and that Michael's is poorly made.  But Vincent's own dress is still, we assume, turning him on.

Gee, Laura's dress sure has a lot of extra webbing.

When they go home that night they are exhausted. Laura is suddenly becoming aware of all of the changes in her body. She's three months into this pregnancy, and her feet and ankles have been swollen the whole time they've been in Paris.

The next day they have to fit the models. Michael discovers that his model is four sizes smaller than he expected. Yikes!  Why are these French models so miniature? Don't they feed them? Do they all live on red wine and exotic European cigarettes? Actually, that sounds fun.

The designers scramble to fix last minute problems. Tim catches Vince gluing on tons of stuff, including his hem.  Is that what Catherine Malandrino meant by "Hand detailing?" 

It's time to go to a mystery location to meet up with Catherine Malandrino. Tim takes them to a section of the Seine River where there is a boat waiting for them. Along the way, some weird Frenchman sitting up on a balcony decides to throw eggs at them. Some of the egg splatters on Michael's model, and he is not happy about it. Egg is better than bird droppings, though, so he shouldn't be too upset.

They get onto the boat and Catherine is there to greet them for a little boat party. She says that making a couture gown in two days is extremely difficult, and they all look magnifique, and she toasts them all with champagne.

Catherine chats with each of the designers and asks them what their inspiration was. She also asks Jeffrey about his scary neck tattoo.  Apparently the words written in cursive spell Harrison Detroit, which is the name of Jeffrey's son. Because the first thing you do when you have a child is have his name tattooed to your neck in case you forget it.

Catherine thinks the yellow cotton material Jeffrey used is fun and audacious.  She says Laura's dress is daring with its long sleeves and tells Kayne that she's impressed with how the laces down the back fit so perfectly on his dress.

Catherine also likes Uli's "light, effortless" dress. And it is very pretty.

She asks Vincent's inspiration and he starts coming on to her, complimenting her on everything -- her mannerisms and the whole French package. Catherine is very sweet with him. Add Catherine Malandrino to the list of things that turn Vincent on.

The lovely Catherine Malandrino (picture doesn't do her justice)

Vincent pushes his luck and asks her what she thinks about his dress. "Do you think it's more modern or a throwback?"  And she sweetly says "It's an interesting dress." Uh oh. When a guy goes out on a date, the last thing he wants to be told is that he's "interesting."

The designers have their models do a runway walk right there on the boat and Catherine scores the garments.  Her scores will be sent back to New York and will be added to the scores of the New York panel of judges.

The designers enjoy the rest of the evening. The next day they return to New York. Au revoir, Paris!

Back home, they now have to refit the garments on their usual models. Kayne's Parisian model had been a good deal smaller, and Michael has to do something about suddenly having a model who is four sizes bigger than his model in Paris.

Laura's ruffled collar and sleeves got crushed in transit, so she has to fluff them up again and make them look fresh.

It's time for the runway. The judges are Heidi, Michael Kors, Nina Garcia and guest judge, designer Richard Tyler, who looks more like one of Mick Jagger's friends than a designer. But whatever.

Kayne's gorgeous dress

(I'm giving Kayne one Mystic Point for this one. Time to show him some love for this great dress and his funky design sensibilities.)

Uli's pretty dress

(I'm giving her one Mystic Point. I think she should have won for this challenge.)

Jeffrey's Statue of Liberty "Happy, freedom, free" dress

Michael is "sweating like a whore in church" during the runway because he can see the many fit problems with the dress. But it still looks elegant with the lovely Nazri working it.

Michael's dress had fit problems, but Nazri rocked it as usual!

Laura's 1930's style dress

Vincent's "The back should be the front" dress

The judges ask the designers about their gowns. Uli goes first. Everybody loves her dress and says it's a very grown up design. Michael Kors is happy that it doesn't go with flip-flops like her other beach-friendly outfits.

The whole dogpile of judges jump on Kayne. I thought his dress was lovely and that Amanda with her red hair was a vision when she came out in it. But none of the panel likes it. They think it is "too much."

They like Jeffrey's dress. It's not perfect, but it is creative and Richard Tyler says that the model looked like she was having fun wearing it, which is important.

Aha! So there is a "Model Funness" quotient that the judges have secretly been incorporating into their scores! You models, you'd better get hopping and jumping and smiling if you want to win.

Vincent's dress doesn't impress.  Nina points out that the back of the dress would have looked better in the front and vice versa. And Richard Tyler says it's not couture, especially with the flower detail he sewed on the back.

Michael's dress is weird with the strange curvy inserts that sit above the neckline.  They ask if they can be tucked in, and he tucks them in, and suddenly the neckline looks much nicer.

Laura's dress is not a favorite, either. Nina feels that it is too old looking, very vintage Yves St. Laurent, not modern. Michael Kors says, "If you gave her a feather duster she looks like a French maid."  Which unfortunately is true.

The judges confer privately and talk things over. They also incorporate Catherine Malandrino's scoring and notes.  Uli and Jeffrey are rated the best.  Vincent and Laura are at the bottom. Catherine had written the following about Vincent's dress: "No, no, no no."

That's a lot of "Nos." Was that in response to him hitting on her? Maybe she was just trying to find a polite way of turning him down and decided to write in on a notecard, and it somehow got mixed in with the scorecards.

They bring the designers back out. They announce the winner first. It's . . . Jeffrey.

Huh.

They tell him his dress is fun and fashion forward and hip. 

Huh.

It looked like a tablecloth you'd take with you on a picnic. Ah well. "Chacun à son goût," as Tim Gunn often says when the judges don't agree with his take on things. That's "Each one to his taste" in French. You can't slip any more French phrases past me, Monsieur Gunn!

The judges tell Uli, Michael, and Kayne that they're in.

It's down to Vincent and Laura. One of them will be sent home. Suddenly, I'm worried about Laura. She's such a cool designer, and Vincent is not.  She'd better not be going home!

Phew. She's not. Vincent is out, Laura is in.

Vincent reminds us at his exit interview that he had quit a job and cashed out his 401k to do the show, but says he likes to take risks and he's very thankful to Project Runway. He also reminds us, in case we forgot, that "It just got me off."

And so we get Vincent off the show - finally.  It was time for him to go.

In the preview for the next episode we see Laura looking unhappy and crying and making some reference to the Olsen twins.  I hope she doesn't have to design something for them. That would be tough. Although, since they're both so tiny, she wouldn't have to use up much of her budget buying fabric for them. A postage stamp's worth of cloth would do.

That's it for this week!

If you missed my earlier recaps, you'll find them here:

Articles index

Lipstick Mystic Points Awarded So Far:

Vincent Libretti:      1 Wacky Mystic Point from first week; 3 Mystic Patience Points from second week; grand total: 4 Mystic Points (eliminated)

Alison Kelly:       1 Cute and Kittenish Mystic Point from first week; 1 Enthusiasm Mystic Point from third week; 2 Sweet Ingenue Mystic Point from fourth week; 1 Sweet Moonbeams and Fairy Dreams Point from sixth week: Grand Total: 5 Mystic Points (eliminated)

Robert Best:       2 Funny and Fabulous Mystic Points from first week; 1 Remember You're Fabulous Point from fifth week; 1 You Rock Mystic Point from sixth week; 1 Sweet Soul Point from seventh episode; (eliminated) Grand Total: 5 Mystic Points

Malan Breton:       2 Mysterious and Villainous Mystic Points from first week; 2 Mystic Patience Points (for not killing his evil mother) from second week; sub-total so far: 4 Mystic Points (Eliminated second episode; we'll miss you, Malan!)

Laura Bennett:       1 Cool Mom Mystic Point from first week; 1 Well-Dressed Pup Mystic Point from third week; 2 Taming the Rosette Mystic Point from fourth week; 1 Mystic Pregnancy Point from seventh week; sub-total so far: 5 Mystic Points

Michael Knight:       1 Fierce Talent Mystic Point from first week; 1 Underappreciated Genius Mystic Point from third week; 2 Taming the Rosette Mystic Points from fourth week; 1 Zen Master Mystic Point and 1 Well-Deserved Recognition Point from fifth week; 1 Mind Over Matter Mystic Point from sixth week; sub-total so far: 7 Mystic Points

Jeffrey Sebelia:       1 Pageants Are Weird Mystic Point from first week; 2 I Finally Get You Mystic Points from fourth week; 1 Villain Point from fifth week; 1 Ugly/Beautiful Mystic Point from sixth week; sub-total so far: 5 Mystic Points

Keith Michael:       1 Model Strategizing Mystic Point from second week; grand total 1 Mystic Point (eliminated fourth episode)

Uli Herzner:       1 Dining Mystic Point from third week; 1 Model Strategizing Mystic Point from third week; 2 Uli Love Mystic Points from sixth week; 1 Party Girl Mystic Point from eighth week; 1 Uli Love Point from this week; sub-total 6 Mystic Points

Bradley Baumkirchner: 1 Trust Your Vision Mystic Point from third week; 1 Best Roommate Ever Mystic Point from this week; total 2 Mystic Points (eliminated fifth episode)

Angela Keslar:       1 Dr. Evil Mystic Point from second week; 1 Incomprehensible Aesthetic Mystic Point from third week; 1 Wow You Have Talent Point from fifth week; 2 Mystic Patience Points from this week; grand total: 5 Mystic Points (eliminated)

Darlene, Angela's mom: 2 Mystic Patience Points from seventh episode

Tim Gunn: 2 Adoration and Worship Mystic Points from fourth week

Kara Janx: 1 Viva La Janx, Long Live the Janx Mystic Point from sixth week

Kayne Gillaspie: 3 Mystic Weight Loss Points from seventh week; 1 Country Star Mystic Point from eighth week; 1 Pretty Design Point from this week; sub-total so far: 5 Mystic Points

New Shop Opened for Runway Gear!

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And if you missed out on Season One & Season Two, check out the DVD's:

 Project Runway Season One - The Complete First Season

 Project Runway Season Two - The Complete Second Season