Can a Cancer and Aries Combo Work?

Dear Lipstick Mystic,

I'm a horoscope maniac and read your Lipstick Mystic Stars forecasts each week. I find this week’s horoscope for me to be hilarious. I'm a Cancer –as you know, a sensitive, dependent control freak. However, I've recently discovered that my current boyfriend had past experiences with prostitutes and filmed them! That's how I found out (by finding the videos). It was really pleasant, in fact, just mind-blowing. In any event, I've been trying to cope with it for some time. I found out about a month or so ago, and we've since reconciled, but my memory of it freaks me out from time to time.

So, what is the supernatural explanation? Just bad luck? Or is it a test? My birth date is 7/8/82. The time is 9:21 am in Willingboro, NJ. The honey is 4/4/75, I don't know the time. I keep hearing Cancer/Aries couples are not ideal, but this is the best relationship I've ever been in. Besides the mishaps, we have this extremely intimate and comfortable companionship. My therapist said I need to stop holding his feet to the fire and learn to trust him. I want to trust him, he has given me no reason to doubt him, except his past. Sooooo, I'm trying really hard not to be a pain in the ass and just accept all the good loving he gives me and stop worrying.

That's my situation in a nutshell. I must thank you for your consideration onthis, I greatly appreciate it.

-- Curious Cancer

Hi Curious,

Overall, Cancers have had one of those ho-hum types of years - neither great nor horrible. Saturn is in the sign of Cancer right now, which highlights stuff on the home front. If there's something out of whack in a personal relationship, strict task master Saturn will tend to equalize the situation - that is, bring balance to it. Sometimes this balancing process isn't fun, though! Maybe that's what happened to you. The truth about his past had to get out, sooner or later.

In looking at your chart I see that, although you’re a Cancer sun sign (Cancers are Water signs,) you have a lot of Air signs in your chart (Gemini and Libra.) This means that in many ways you’re more of an Air sign than a Water sign. You may find that, since your Mercury is in Gemini and your Venus is in Gemini, you fit Gemini horoscopes better than the ones for Cancer. A lot of your personality is shaped by the qualities of Air –intellectual and thoughtful, with diverse interests and talents and a need for variety in her social life. Geminis also have a very split quality at times, tending to be “schizophrenic.”They can question something to death, going back and forth about it. So I’m sure that this situation with your boyfriend is driving you nuts. Your personality likes to have balance and clarity, and until you have that, you’ll go back and forth in your decision-making process. One minute, you want to marry the guy. The next minute, you never want to look at him again. Go easy, girl! Don’t make any bold moves until you feel more centered about what feels right for you in the situation. This may take several months.

Your honey is a bit of an astrological “mutt”with his sun in Fire sign Aries, moon in Earth sign Capricorn, Mercury in Water sign Pisces, and Venus in Earth sign Taurus. Because he has a bit of a split personality too, and these influences are so very different, you may find it hard to sense where he’s coming from one minute to the next. I don’t think that he means to be deceptive at all, and there appears to be a lot of real affection between the two of you. This energy may well continue to grow and mature, given time. But there are a lot of communication issues to iron out. You know how some people can be pretty much the same, day in and day out? Well, your honey’s not like that at all. It’s like he’s got five people living inside his head. If you try to read his mind on a typical day, you’ll get dizzy, because there's so much going on in there!

The best advice I can give you based on your charts is to practice being open about stuff and to discharge any anxieties you have in the moment, in a light and loving way. Don’t let stuff build up until it’s really dragging you down, because he doesn’t like it when you make a BIG ANNOUNCEMENT about something. (He dreads those, “We have to TALK!”announcements.) Instead, try to blow off the little stuff each day so that you can forget about it before you go to sleep that night. If you can poke fun at yourself, that will help to heal any rift between the two of you. I can see you going, “You know I’m neurotic, but will you humor me, honey? You didn’t really mean anything by (insert issue here,) did you?”You know, find a gentle and funny way of talking things over.

Both of you have a great sense of humor and a warm appreciation for music and the arts. So some of your best healing may come in doing simple things like taking in a concert in the park, having a picnic, visiting an arts show, etc. You have a lot of those things in common, and I can see these bonds tying you together even more strongly over time.

Overall, I’d say, there’s powerful energy between the two of you and a very unusual and special bond. Every relationship has its bumps and bruises, so ignore those negative predictions that astrologers usually make about Cancer and Aries combos. Since your charts show that you are each a complex mixture of signs, discard those old notions about how you get along astrologically and focus on learning to appreciate the multiple sides of each of your personalities. If, over time, his past proves to be a stumbling block you just can’t get over, then it’s okay to move on. But I think there are also many potentials for healing here.

I wish you the very best in this exciting (and never boring) relationship.

-- Lipstick Mystic